chelsea handler

Recently I read the masterpiece Are You There Vodka? It's me Chelsea by Chelsea Handler. Obviously from the cover and title you can tell it's a thought provoking account of a recovering alcoholic. But no, it was a memoir of sorts, with no real structure. It was just a series of stories from Handler's childhood which leads on to her twenties and thirties. My favourite stories are the ones that involve her dad.

He seems like a real force of a man. He wears mustard sweatpants which go up to his nipples and are held up by suspenders. He pees in his backyard because he can't be bothered walking to the toilet. He seems unapologetic and crass, someone who I would hate in real life and spend hours bitching about, but someone I love in fiction.

I'm just about to finish Are You There Vodka? so I decided to look up Handler's next book, My Horizontal Life. I went on amazon and perused the reviews. Some of them are quite harsh. Here are some extracts:

'I cannot believe anyone but a retarded pre teen would find this remotely funny.'

' I'm surprised she has survived these experiences without getting raped, seriously hurt or diseased.'

Imagine those printed glorious reviews printed across the cover. I think everyone has a right to their own opinion and I respect that, but mine matters above all else. The book's subtitle is A series of one night stands. If you don't want to read about Chelsea thoroughly enjoying herself then don't buy the book. Some say her humour is shallow and racist and that her lifestyle is repulsive, but that is the thing that I love about her. At first I was taken aback by how frank, and even how rude she can be. But as I read her book I just stopped taking her seriously and let myself enjoy her storytelling. It's great entertainment, and yes, can be offensive but I perceive it as irony more than anything else. I love how she can laugh at what a slurry she was/is.

I think most of the more abrasive reviews are from women. Why are women so harsh to judge other women? I know that sounds like I think I'm so far removed from that equation, that I'm not a part of 'women' and you're exactly right. Kind of. I think if a man wrote about his various sexual conquests I would buy the book to burn it. I would be disgusted. But with Chelsea's book and I just laughed and thought 'What a slut,hahah!' in a very endearing kind of way. I'm sure women and men should be treated equally but since we all know that is not possible, we should just go ahead and favour women.

good week

To my non existent readers,

I apologise for my laziness. I was consumed by uni work and had no time to breathe nevermind blog. This semester has been a whirlwind, everything was a blur until the very end when I saw a dim light at the end of the tunnel.

But now it's break and it feels great. I will now proceed to bore everyone, including myself, with the inane details of my first week of break because I don't want to forget how good it feels to do absolutely nothing worthwhile.

Last week straight after exams ( and the obligatory post exam chat/vent/moan with a friend) I went home and baked cookies. I know whoo! And then I chatted with a friend until 4 am.

On Tuesday I went to meet a friend to eat lunch. Lunch was interesting, to say the least. It was at a vegetarian restaurant that served fake meat. We ate vego chicken and vego fish. I guess it is better than eating meat if you ignore the fistful of MSG that is on every plate. We went vintage shopping next, and we went to this amazing store in Inglewood. It's called Mo Mo's and the owner is just lovely. We had a nice chat and I found out that she has been in the vintage clothing business all her life. She knew all the labels and stories behind the pieces of clothing. It's so wonderful to see someone so passionate and genuinely happy with their career.

On Wednesday, I had a meeting and then went to an advanced screening (1 whole day before it was released, talk about VIP treatment) of Get Him to the Greek- it was actually entertaining and Russell Brand wasn't as ridiculous as I thought he would be.

On Thursday, my sister skipped school and had lunch with me and my brother. Then I went shopping and bought some cheap heels.

On Friday, I was dirt poor but I had to bid farewell to my friend who is going to Indonesia for a month to teach. We went to the gallery and saw this amazing exhibition by Patricia Piccini. It's called Relativity and I have absolutely no clue about art, but I was dumbfounded by the amount of creativity and work people are willing to put into their pieces. Relativity features models of these creatures that Piccini invented and there were so realistic I got goosebumps. The skin had blemishes and veins, the children looked so innocent and carefree- everything about it was magical and eery. The picture above doesn't do it justice so please check it out if it comes to a gallery near you. This is coming from someone who never sets foot in a gallery to avoid art snobbery but it was gorgeous. Especially compared to the 'exhibition' I viewed before which was Ben Frost's Tales of Terror.

I use the term 'exhibition' loosely as there were about 10 portraits at most and there were featured in a boutique. I don't want to offend anyone, but that viewing cost me $8 in parking and it really was not worth it. As I mentioned before I do not profess to have any particular knowledge about art, but I was vaguely reminded of Andy Warhol when viewing Frost's pieces. And that is not a good thing in my book. Pop art is something that I will never see the appeal of. Especially not when something as abstract as imaginary monsters can evoke something inside of me. I believe that art can make you sit in awe at the sheer talent that some people have, or it can make you think, it can make you happy or sad. Ben Frost does nothing to me. Actually, that's not true. I feel angry and ripped off. I could have used that $8.

I know he is a much more talented artist that I will ever be and I'm happy that he is successful, but he is just not my cup of tea. Mainly because I don't enjoy meaningless crap in my tea. That's too far, I'm sorry, just an Aziz Ansari reference!

My weekend was actually really boring, the highlight being a trip to the farmers market which gave me awesome brownies. I had no money, so I skipped a trip to the cas.

Ok that's enough for one post.

More later!